Our Birth Story – Part 5
I remember the Doctor saying that he couldn’t believe the speed at which I labored. He said when he read what the nurses sent, he thought it was a typo but came to my room to check it out anyway. He said he got to the room basically in time to just keep Lillian from hitting the floor, LOL! This is the really awful part though. I remember them saying they were just going to repair me a bit because I’d torn. I thought, ok, let’s get it done. I was terrified, but holding my daughter kept me happily distracted. Then they took her from me though, to weigh her and measure her and things like that. I was so scared. Josh was over with Lillian, and my Mom was holding my hand. The doctor injected me with a local anesthetic down there, and started sewing me up. VERY unpleasant. But he kept saying it would just be two minutes more. I kept wondering why he would keep saying that. Then I was noticing that he was acting like there was a problem. That was REALLY really scaring me. He looked up at me and said that they were going to have to take me to the Operating Room. I felt like I was falling down a black hole. It was terrifying and devastating to hear that. What was wrong? Was I going to die? How is this happening? He said that I tore very close to the urethra and he couldn’t see well enough in the labor and delivery room to not accidentally sew it closed. That would be very bad, of course, because then I could never pee! He said they had to take me immediately and that I would have a spinal put in, and Josh couldn’t come with me. I PANICKED at this point. I felt like life had just been starting and that now it was ending. I truly thought I’d never see my loved ones again. I just had a really bad feeling about going to the O.R. Plus, I was devastated that I went through all that pain of natural labor and avoided an epidural and then I would have to be put on a spinal anyway?! I just couldn’t believe it.
I started wailing and hyperventilating. I remember I was crying and screaming “No! NO! I don’t want to go to the OR!!” I kept pleading and begging with the doctor. Then he called in a second surgeon, and they decided they could just go ahead and try to do it there. He warned me it would be very painful, as where they would be stitching the local anesthetic wouldn’t really affect. I just wanted it over with. So they went to work. It was the most painful, torturous, absolute worst and scariest time in my life. But thank you God, they succeeded. They had to put a catheter in my urethra to keep it open to ensure they wouldn’t sew it closed. So that wasn’t fun to have a catheter, but at least my urethra wasn’t accidentally sewn closed! I know it upset my Mom very much to see me in so much pain, but I was so grateful that she was there. Josh’s Mom and my Dad had come in, too, and they were able to meet Lillian and see me, too. Poor Josh at this point was having to deal with Viacord (the nurses apparently weren’t used to the procedure, so Josh was ending up locating cord tissue and labeling it and packaging it.) He was on the phone with Viacord and was so frustrated that he had to deal with this. I know he was so stressed at what was happening to me, and having to deal with them at the same time. But at least we have her cord blood and tissue banked now. That’s something we hope and pray we never have to use though!
Another painful thing that happened at this point was the nurse coming to check to see how my uterus was doing (not sure exactly what they were checking), and she pressed really hard on my stomach and that hurt REALLY bad! And a gush of blood came out. They did that off and on for the rest of that day and the next. It started hurting less each time they did it, at least. After I rested there for a while after being sewn up, they put me on a gurney and put Lillian back in my arms (what a great feeling that was…I never got enough of holding her!) and wheeled me to the fifth floor where they put us in a semi-private visiting room. (That room is a story in itself, lol! We wish we’d had a private room!) Then Becky, Laura, George, Deanna, (and even Makayla!) were able to come in and join Josh, me, Lillian, Mom, Dad, and Kathleen in the room. Everybody was so emotional to get to see Lillian for the first time, and to hold her. It was such a wonderful time! We had a little scare with Lillian at one point when the nurses were bathing her…she turned a little blue and was choking. I was so high on new mom hormones that I couldn’t stop sobbing even when they told me she was ok. She’d choked on a bit of mucous that got into her lungs, but was ok. (The next day, she spit up and was choking again, and Josh and the nurses had to take her away to pump her stomach to get rid of the last of the mucous in her.) She was ok after that…but those were scary times!
Here are some great pictures that Laura got for us on Saturday, May 28th, Lillian’s birthday! Thank you Laura!
(By the way, those ceramic booties above were given to my Mom when one of us girls was born. Mom had saved it and found it recently and set it aside! Becky had a bouquet put into them and brought them to us. It was such a fun surprise! Laura and Brett got us the beautiful bouquet of lilies in the photo above, too, and the teddy bear here.)
Lillian Eve’s stats:
Born on Saturday May 28, 2011 at 7:19 AM
7 pounds 4 ounces
18 and 3/4 inches long